We take care of others with all our might and our effort. We push our limits because the people around us always tell us that we can make it. But, doing this could just leave a void in our lives creating an empty shell. Therefore, we must care for ourselves as well before doing so many things.
A Guided Discussion About Self-Care
Taking care of others has always been a part of our lives. Our mothers did that to us when they first knew that we were conceived. Following diets and doing prenatal exercises, they did it all just to make us healthy. Well, all of us since they are doing it for both of our sakes. However, who takes care of them when they are sick?
The speaker for this discussion is Christine Rollings. Christine together with her husband Trent are co-founders of Narrative Coffee Company in Salcedo Village, Makati. She has her Masters in Counseling from Cairn University in Pennsylvania. Actually, we both enjoy reading, writing and tea! It’s quite funny because we almost have the same name. Hers is spelled with a “Ch” and mine starts with “K” and we both are huggers which really cute!
I met her at an event in The Office Project way back 2015 or 2016. Though we haven’t been in touch then, I remembered her cheery and optimistic personality. Something that reminded me of myself as well. Personally, I was excited about this event because life can become toxic in some ways and could really get the best of you. Doing things and pursuing your passion and aspirations can drain you to the point that you’re just an empty shell. Once a while, it’s good to learn new things and meet new people and connect with them.
The event was held last February 28, from 6pm to 8pm at The Office Project (TOP).
It feels good to be back in TOP. The familiar feeling of being a creative hub and a place for freelancers and alike was coming back. Truly, a feeling that I missed and would want to feel again. Recuperating from an illness was hard especially if you were partially deaf and could not breathe properly. Who took care of me? No one else but me, myself and I.
The Self-Care Journal
For starters, each of the participants received a copy of this notebook or journal. This is where you will write or draw your notes or whatever you feel like doing during the discussion. From the title itself, there are guide questions along the way that will aid you in thinking out ways in taking care of yourself.
It’s a fact that we sometimes go overboard in doing certain things because we want to be stable at some point. However, the opportunity cost will always be our health. Overworking because we want to achieve something.
[bctt tweet=”Don’t sacrifice your health for anything. Love yourself and take good care of your body.” username=”Mariaisquixotic”]
How are you currently feeling?
How will you answer this? It’s a simple question with a complex answer. An answer that may be answered with a word, a sentence, or a paragraph. It all depends on how you see things and your perspective.
There were three (3) boxes on this page which contained choices for the question:
- I have no space in my life. Traffic. Family. Work. Friends. Sidelines. I’m tired. I don’t have time to care for myself well.
- Okay lang. 🙂 (or I’m okay.)
- A blank box where in you are at the liberty on whether you will write your answer or draw it.
Of course, I wrote mine since I do not have any talent in drawing. I wrote meh. It was neither. Being at some point in your life is something but accomplishing things with your own prowess is another. It just feels fulfilling when you reach things independently.
For example, taking care of yourself while you’re sick is challenging especially if you are alone at some place that’s so far away from home.
After that question, there’s a blank page wherein you may continue writing or drawing how you are feeling right now.
What gives you life?
Life is composed of various aspects like physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. What gives you life for these aspects? How do you recharge to be able to do physical activities?
We were asked to fill out the table that was divided into four (4). The table consisted of the major aspects of life that could influence us greatly. From physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual, we enumerated activities that could recharge us under these categories.
To share a few, here what were mentioned during the discussion about physical:
- Going home to the province
Discussing the emotional aspect led us to these:
- Hugs – may it be long hugs, back hugs. It makes you feel secure and warm especially if you feel that there’s a void in there.
- Taking long walks could allow a person to think about certain things. This could crossover with the mental aspect as well.
- Venting out – this helps you release emotion and thoughts that may have been bottled up for a while now.
About the mental aspect:
- Writing (may it be in the form of blogging or poetry or whatever kind)
- Attending workshops wherein you may learn something new. This could satisfy the need for knowledge since humans keep on evolving and making new discoveries almost every single day.
Lastly, the spiritual aspect:
- Sharing your blessings with others (in forms of donations or volunteering)
- Going to church
There are various ways to recharge from a stressful day, week, or month. Doing some of these could actually help you breathe in some freshness while living in a city which can be both toxic and sane. I forgot to mention that mentioned doing calligraphy and blogging to activities that could recharge me emotionally and mentally. Walking with my dogs freshens up my physical being especially doing it at home in Legazpi. Having a moment with God will always be my favorite spiritual activity. It could be by meditating or just celebrating mass.
What’s your way of recharging yourself? Or better, what gives you life?
We face a lot of things from our day to day lives but despite accomplishing those, we can’t help feel drained. Things can be really tiring and we can’t help but just ask for a break where we can just breathe. Even if people around us tell us that we can do this, there will always come to a point wherein we just can’t feel anything. We are just a shell walking around like a zombie wanting some brain. Too tired to function? Get some rest, asap!
The things we do are essential to us and if you are a creative living in a harsh world, being awake when everyone else are sleeping is the new normal. Doing things in the wee hours of the day is our favorite hobby because it’s when the ideas flow endlessly.
It’s going to be a lifelong regret if we ignored those ideas because once they’re gone, you won’t see them again. Maybe someday, when someone has picked that idea up and turned it into something productive already.
While we still can, we have to love ourselves before thinking of others’ welfare. You’ll never know if they think about yours too. It’s a cruel world and we must not be cruel to ourselves. They deserve so much for enduring the things we do. While we’re at it, let’s change things one step at a time.
Let me ask you a question.
What is one change you can make (after reading this) to take better care of yourself?
There will be a second part of the Guided Discussion about Self-Care on March 28, 2017 from 6pm to 8pm at The Office Project. This is in collaboration with Woomen.ph and Narrative Coffee Company.
To register, click this. There is a door charge of Php 300 which is inclusive of workshop kit, speciality coffee from Narrative Coffee Company and a chance to win a coworking pass from TOP.
ROBERT LEE | Amazing Life DailyMarch 8, 2017 at 8:56 AM
I agree with the essence of the discussion. Here is what we have been talking about with a small circle of friends in personal development, and I am sure it is a quote from someone I cannot remember as of now. We spend much of our lives earning money, and then using the money we earned to pay for our healthcare. How does that sound? I think that is one of life’s greatest irony. There is no escape from that, though. Ultimately, we will get sick. No matter how much care we give to ourselves, the body will fail. I am saying that to put things in perspective.
MariaMarch 10, 2017 at 12:42 AM
That’s true actually. Most do not save for the future, like health issues. They would just spend it in a moment. I just wish we could start caring more about our health.
CykanikiMarch 9, 2017 at 10:59 PM
My greatest moment of loving myself is to pause, talked to Him in more personal way, venting everything to Him and telling Him what’s in my mind, and He is God, I’m not ashamed to share this but that’s the truth, refueling your spiritual side to empower the rest.
BhushavaliMarch 11, 2017 at 4:20 AM
I’m a strong believer in self-care! I strongly believe that unless I’m strong I can’t push my beloved ones to get healthy. Unless I do things that make me happy, unless I’m happy, I can’t keep my beloved ones happy!!! Some may call it being selfish – but self comes before others!!!
Nilyn MatugasMarch 11, 2017 at 7:31 AM
Ah. Self care. I don’t know if I still have that. I may have, sometimes, but it doesn’t seem to be my priority now. I have so many things in my load, I don’t even know where to start first. I definitely need long hugs, though. I get one from my son, and that gives me relief each time. I hope soon, I also get the hug of security from my husband. This is the struggle of an OFW wife.
Orana VelardeMarch 11, 2017 at 9:21 PM
I have spent the whole day just begging my kids to stop asking me for things and other stuff like saying “mommy look” every ten seconds. I can’t concentrate, there is too much on my plate and self care just seems like a distant dream. I appreciate the reminder of having to stop and take a breath for myself and on my own. The event seems like a really intimate and wonderful experience, I hope it helped you.
Berlin | Momi BerlinMarch 11, 2017 at 9:29 PM
My working table was a mess. And I just didnt care.
Last night, I had the urge to clean up. I got a big crate box and luckily it fits under my table. I dumped all my stuff there and promised myself to.go.back and sort them out.
Going back to your question, perhaps I did already last night the thing I need to change. The change caused me to regain my confidence and healthy relationship with my husband.
My husband saw my working table this morning. He commented, ” love your table now. Very you when I first met you.”
Stella the TraveleretteMarch 11, 2017 at 10:47 PM
This was very helpful to read about! Self care is so important and it can be easy to neglect. I often feel like I take care of myself mentally and physically but neglect myself emotionally and spiritually. I work two jobs and blog, so sometimes it seems like I can’t fit church into my schedule. But this is a good reminder not to neglect that.
KT NielsenMarch 12, 2017 at 12:17 AM
I really love this – Don’t sacrifice your health for anything. Love yourself and take good care of your body. – and so I tweeted it! It really is true and I could only agree. I often disregard myself and I forget to take “good” care of myself so I can prioritize other people around me. Reading your blog has made me realize again that sometimes I need to put myself more so that I can give more.
IndraniMarch 12, 2017 at 3:54 PM
I realize now how much I have neglected myself. Daily life is so hectic. And most of the time goes taking care of others around you than on self.
This post has been kind of eye opener. I need to devote more time to self.
Claire SantiagoMarch 12, 2017 at 4:17 PM
Maybe I just have to take things easy, I mean if I stressed my self more, no one would suffer but only me. many times I’ve neglected being healthy – sleepless nights, overworking – maybe, I need to lessen my burden…
FernaMarch 12, 2017 at 6:17 PM
The change that I am thinking after reading this is taking chances whenever there is a need to. Sleep, eat, rest are one of the essential things to do in our daily living, and that, of course, categorize on what to eat, when to sleep and when to rest. I may not be an expert about life, but I also am aware of what do I need to take good care of myself. I think awareness should come first in order to understand well why there is a need to for this, some people will not understand instead they go and move things up or higher responsibility to build more money without being aware of what consequences it will take them in a healthier life.
Maaya LegaspiMarch 13, 2017 at 4:35 PM
Self care sounds hmm.. how do put it? I guess, it sounds neutral to me. I mean, I’m not the type who works day in and day out. I value my physical body because with this, I get to do a lot of stuff. We spend countless times of doing things for others that we might forget we need to take some time for ourselves too.
That seminar looks like a lot of fun! IF I were there, I would probably learn something more about myself. 🙂
ZwitsyMarch 15, 2017 at 2:35 AM
Whoah, the question you have at the bottom part… that hit me hard! Well, I certainly agree on not investing too much in working where we risk our health just to get our aim. I am very much guilty of it. I guess I would need to make a change in my routine and that is taking care of myself. Taking care of myself by the means of only do things I can do at a given period time and spend more quality time with my loved ones.
MeeraMarch 15, 2017 at 10:15 AM
Every time I want to take care of my health, something or the other turns up. And the self care gets postponed, unless otherwise it is something urgent.. Self care is a very important part of the regime. I should focus on my lifestyle for a healthy and a happy time. It’s high time now. Thanks for the reminder.
ASKSonnieMarch 17, 2017 at 1:24 AM
Pausing from our busy life to reflect, and recalibrate our priorities is a must exercise to ensure we take care of our physical, mental, social and spiritual health. Thanks to this post, I need to make that me time to care for myself.
MirandaMarch 20, 2017 at 3:52 AM
Self care is the one thing I lack most of all. I get so wrapped up in daily life that sometimes I forget that I need to take care of me too. Oh, the joys of having children. lol. I’d say the one thing I do for myself is quilting. It is its own form of therapy, and I am lucky enough to have an amazing mentor to help me along when even that gets discouraging. You have shared some great tips and a thought provoking question! The one thing I will make to take better care of myself is time, time to do something solely for me everyday!